{"id":184,"date":"2020-02-08T15:28:00","date_gmt":"2020-02-08T15:28:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/stevesearls.com\/?p=184"},"modified":"2020-01-31T15:32:50","modified_gmt":"2020-01-31T15:32:50","slug":"claras-miracle","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/stevesearls.com\/?p=184","title":{"rendered":"Clara&#8217;s Miracle"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>Clara sat in an aisle seat at the performance hall of the <a href=\"http:\/\/hochstein.org\/\">Hochstein School of Music and Dance<\/a>,\n smiling at us, holding her sheet music, because she would lead off the \nevening&#8217;s program.  Relaxed, she happily chatted with her mother, \nbrother, sister-in-law, one niece and our adult children. Clara was \nabout to walk onto a stage for the first time in decades and perform, \nbut looked as if she had not a care in the world. I, on the other hand, \nwas terrified.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>A little after seven o&#8217;clock in the evening, following some \nintroductory remarks by her piano instructor regarding that evening&#8217;s \nprogram, my wife got up, climbed a short flight of stairs and walked \nacross the performance hall&#8217;s gleaming wooden stage to where two grand \npianos stood, side by side.  She arranged her three pages for the piece \nshe was to perform, <a href=\"https:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Friedrich_Kuhlau\">Friederich Kulau&#8217;s<\/a>\n Sonatina in C Major (Op.55, No. 1), on her chosen piano&#8217;s music rack, \nseated herself, adjusted the settings for the bench, and then, after a \nbrief pause, started to play:\n<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure><iframe loading=\"lazy\" allowfullscreen=\"true\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/SfG1KZK1gK0?modestbranding=0&amp;html5=1&amp;rel=0&amp;autoplay=0&amp;wmode=opaque&amp;loop=0&amp;controls=1&amp;autohide=0&amp;showinfo=0&amp;theme=dark&amp;color=red&amp;enablejsapi=0\" width=\"450\" height=\"300\"><\/iframe><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>How nice, right?  Not bad for a 57 year old woman, who once upon a  time had to choose between going to Julliard or an Ivy League school,  and went with the latter option because she suffered from performance  anxiety.  But that video has a much deeper, and at times darker, story  behind it.  Standing alone, it doesn&#8217;t begin to tell you the true nature  of the long and tortured path she took that led to her performing on  that stage this past Wednesday night. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Here&#8217;s what you need to know about Clara, my wife and life partner, \nto understand why her piano recital was an amazing and, yes, miraculous \naccomplishment.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>On July 29, 2006, Clara&#8217;s life was radically altered when a large \nsection of her pancreas was removed because it contained a malignant \ntumor.  Pancreatic cancer patients have a very low survival rate, but \ncancer did not kill her. In eleven days she will have been cancer free \nfor ten years.  That&#8217;s a miracle in itself, and one all of us, her \nfamily and friends, still count among our blessings. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>However, what none of us expected was that her chemotherapy \ntreatments would permanently and severely damage her brain.  In effect, <a href=\"http:\/\/www.boomantribune.com\/story\/2008\/5\/30\/7155\/95854\">she lost her mind<\/a> because an old chemotherapy drug, <a href=\"https:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Fluorouracil\">Fluorouracil<\/a>, or 5-FU for short, which is used as an adjunct to radiation treatment, stripped the protective coating of <a href=\"https:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Myelin\">myelin<\/a> from billions of her nerve cells.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>In Clara&#8217;s case, the damage occurred to a large extent in her <a href=\"http:\/\/www.healthline.com\/human-body-maps\/corpus-callosum\">corpus callosum<\/a>, the <a href=\"http:\/\/biology.about.com\/od\/anatomy\/p\/corpus-callosum.htm\">&#8220;thick\n band of nerve fibers &#8230; [that] connects the left and right sides of \nthe brain allowing for communication between both hemispheres.&#8221;<\/a> As <a href=\"https:\/\/www.sciencedaily.com\/releases\/2008\/04\/080421191425.htm\">the 2008 study that demonstrated the neurotoxicity of prolonged term use of 5-FU<\/a> puts it: <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-background has-light-green-cyan-background-color\"><em>&#8220;[S]hort-term systemic administration of 5-FU &#8230; caused both \nacute CNS damage and a syndrome of progressively worsening delayed \ndamage. This damage was not self-repairing, and instead became worse \nover time.&#8221;<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>For Clara that meant that, within six months of her eight week course\n of round the clock administration of 5-FU, she began to show signs of \nshort term memory loss and the inability to concentrate on work-related \ntasks. She had to take short term disability leave from her position as a\n senior diversity manager at Eastman Kodak.  Soon, however, her \ncondition became <a href=\"http:\/\/www.boomantribune.com\/story\/2014\/12\/5\/14933\/9526\">much, much worse<\/a>.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>She had difficulty reading, which she attributed to bad eyesight. She\n began to miss appointments at work, and her memory, especially her \nshort term memory became severely degraded. Her ability to multitask and\n stay focused disappeared. She could no longer process information, and \nbecame easily overwhelmed when in large gatherings. Eventually, she went\n on permanent disability because she could no longer function at work.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Her brain, having lost so many connections, had stopped communicating\n with itself. For example she often found herself looking for her keys, \nthinking they were lost, when all the time she was holding them in her \nother hand. Far worse, she became angry and depressed at what was \nhappening to her, the way in which the life she had so carefully \nconstructed was disintegrating and there was seemingly nothing she could\n do about it. Her moods would swing wildly and her anxiety levels \nskyrocketed to the point she literally thought she was going insane. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>For several years she would spend entire days alone in her car, often\n at a park, because that was the only way she could control her \nenvironment and limit the flood of stimuli that now came into her brain \nwithout any of the &#8216;filters&#8217; that you or I rely upon everyday to allow \nus to function normally. Personal interactions with family members \nbecame strained. She would lash out at me, her brother, her mother and \neven her children. No one understood what was going on.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I have to admit, I had days when I thought she might be going mad as  well.  Days when I felt overwhelmed by what had happened to her, and ho  those losses were affecting my family and myself.  What follows are some  excerpts from an email I wrote on November 29, 2009 to my doctor that  I&#8217;ve never shared before.  It was in response to his email regarding the  worsening of my autoimmune symptoms, but it soon veered off into a  personal rant about how hard it for me to deal with Clara&#8217;s worsening  psychological and physical symptoms:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-background has-light-green-cyan-background-color\"><em>&#8230; I got yelled at this morning when I went to help her take her  medications because it was 9:00 and she was crying.  And by yelled I  mean she ranted and raved like a scene from Sybil and it was pure hatred  directed at me.  <\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-background has-light-green-cyan-background-color\"><em>I was told that I was only helping her at my convenience.  Where was I  at 5:30 am?  Of course I was in the same house &#8230; but my trying to  help was &#8220;at my convenience.&#8221;  I did not raise my voice, but her  screaming and carrying on was exactly like the crazed rants I witnessed  years ago from paranoid schizophrenics when I was a counselor &#8230;<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-background has-light-green-cyan-background-color\"><em>Again, let me reiterate that I did nothing to spark this incident  this morning.  I only walked into the room in which she had slept when I  awoke because of her crying. [&#8230;]  I only asked if there were  specific things I could do for her (such as helping her take her meds &#8212;  the <a href=\"http:\/\/www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/pubmed\/15166683\">Concerta<\/a> and <a href=\"http:\/\/abcnews.go.com\/Health\/Healthday\/story?id=4507456&amp;page=1\">Provigil<\/a>) and for that I was lambasted with pure fury and hatred. [&#8230;] <\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-background has-light-green-cyan-background-color\"><em>She is clearly very depressed and her mood swings are rapid and  increasingly unpredictable.  Indeed this entire week has been one long  series of mood swings from mania to severe depression to angry rages to  uncontrollable tears to anxiety.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-background has-light-green-cyan-background-color\"><em>On Thanksgiving she started crying when she returned home after going  out to eat at her sister-in-law&#8217;s family&#8217;s celebration (an event that  by all accounts she had done well at and enjoyed herself; I was too sick  to attend) because she was still hungry and depressed.  So, sick and  nauseous as I was I fixed her another meal at 9 pm.<\/em>  <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-background has-light-green-cyan-background-color\"><em>When I did that she was all smiles just as when I do other things for  her that she cannot do or will not do by herself &#8212; go to stores to  pick up small items or to the pharmacy to pick up her medications  because she is too overwhelmed to enter them on her own or bring her  meals to her and wait on her hand and foot.  [&#8230;]<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-background has-light-green-cyan-background-color\"><em>Why am I telling you this?  Because I believe we are dealing with a non compos mentis situation. [&#8230;]  <\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-background has-light-green-cyan-background-color\"><em>I am not allowed to call Clara on the phone, only text her, and if I  text too much I will be harangued and criticized for that.  I cannot ask  her about &#8230; any &#8230; topic [that] she finds too upsetting or  overwhelming to discuss.  I am supposed to be able to read her mind and  know when not to ask a question or approach her.<\/em>  <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-background has-light-green-cyan-background-color\"><em>Every day when she leaves the house [to spend hours alone in her car]  I see a more and more disturbed and distressed individual.  Her  appearance is shabby, and gives the impression of confusion, despair and  anxiety. [&#8230;] Once she becomes confused or unable to remember she  becomes agitated and anxious and I have to spend a lot of energy calming  her down, usually while being berated for not knowing what she forgot  or why she is confused.<\/em>  <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-background has-light-green-cyan-background-color\"><em>I believe the medications she takes for her brain dysfunction &#8230; are  having little effect on her mental functioning other than waking her up  in the morning and slightly helping her better focus &#8230; for a few  hours a day, at best. [&#8230;]  She displays periods of paranoia which are  disconnected to reality.&#8221;<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Looking back, I feel ashamed at the angry and selfish tone of that \nemail, but it does provide an accurate description of my experience of \nbeing her caretaker at that time in our lives.  Yet, how much worse was \nit for her, a brilliant woman in the prime of her working career, to \nlose so suddenly all of what gave her life purpose? <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>She could still remember the person she had once been.  Her long-term\n memory remained intact, but she could not distinguish between relevant \ninformation from the irrelevant  She experienced the world now as a \nconstant stream of stimuli that often overwhelmed her.  Our brains \nfilter out such extraneous information every second when we work, play, \nshop, even watch a favorite TV show. Clara could no longer do that. New \ninformation now came at her too fast. Even simple conversations could \nconfuse and disturb her because she could not keep up with the speed of \nthe words other spoke to her. Neuro-cognitive testing revealed her \nreading level had dropped to the first percentile.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>She spent many days writing in journals, not even knowing until she \nwas finished what she had written. She once told me her fingers operated\n independently of her conscious mind. Where once the light shone \nbrightly, now darkness occluded her ability to understand her world. I \ncannot imagine her despair, her anger, her frustration, her fear and her\n deep and abiding sadness at the loss of so much that made her unique \nand special &#8211; all stolen from her by one chemotherapy drug. And not \nleast among the things she lost was her ability to play the piano, to \nmake music.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Gradually, over time, with an acceptance of her limitations and a \nstubborn determination not to allow herself to be defined by her new \nreality, she worked hard to claw back from that abyss.  Her doctors gave\n her no treatment options other than drugs, designed for use by people \nwith ADD, narcolepsy and Alzheimer&#8217;s Disease.  They provided only short \nterm symptomatic benefits, and did nothing to bring about real \nimprovement in her cognitive functioning.  So, Clara, as she had always \ndone throughout her life, took on a new project: herself. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Clara created her own method of rehabilitation. She moved into a \nseparate apartment, where she could have privacy and limit distractions.\n She began to try anything she thought might help her, including playing\n &#8220;brain games&#8221; on websites such as Lumosity for 6 to 8 hours a day, \nwhich allowed her to chart improvement in various cognitive functions. \nShe searched online for anything that might provide an insight into her \ncondition and how to improve it.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>She continued writing down her thoughts in journals, but now she took\n the time to write carefully, slowly, and with conscious awareness of \neach word, each thought that she wrote down on paper.  Her caregivers \nhelped as well, as we all became better at understanding what she needed\n from us.  In this way, she made some progress, but more was needed, \nsomething to help her integrate her mind and body and bring order where \nbefore only chaos reigned.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Then, unexpectedly in 2013, we found the help she needed.  In my car  on the way to pick up prescriptions I tuned into our local public radio  station, WXXI, which was hosting a program regarding music therapy and  the benefits it could provide to people suffering from brain injuries  and other disorders. One of the two guests the host interviewed that day  was  <a href=\"http:\/\/hochstein.org\/About\/Our-People\/Faculty\/Expressive-Arts-Music-Art-Dance-Therapy\/Maria-Battista-Hancock\">Maria Battista-Hancock<\/a>,  the Expressive Arts Department Chair of the Hochstein School of Music  and Dance, and a registered music therapist.  I called the program and  told them about Clara, and within a month Maria was working with her.   She started Clara on relearning the most basic of skills: focus.  Here  is how Clara described it in her speech at a <a href=\"https:\/\/medium.com\/@stevendsearls\/our-begging-bowl-society-df5d7b7cd8#.rypb55uoo\">Hochstein fundraiser<\/a> in April 2016:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-background has-light-green-cyan-background-color\"><em>&#8220;When I started with Maria, we were counting number of steps I \ncould take before faltering  while I also  focused on my breathing.  We \ncelebrated when I reached double digits.  When I started with Maria in \n2013, I would have been unable to enter this room without becoming \ncompletely overwhelmed, disoriented, and in need to run from the barrage\n of stimulation that is here.&#8221;<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Before long, Maria added instruction in dance and piano to Clara&#8217;s treatment program &#8211; dance lessons with <a href=\"http:\/\/hochstein.org\/About\/Our-People\/Faculty\/Dance\/Christopher-Morrison\">Christopher Morrison<\/a>, and piano lessons with <a href=\"http:\/\/hochstein.org\/About\/Our-People\/Faculty\/Piano\/Gary-Palmer\">Dr. Gary Palmer<\/a>.  Not that it was easy. <a href=\"http:\/\/hochstein.org\/About\/News-Social\/Blog\/ArticleID\/31\"> Far from it<\/a>. From Hochstein&#8217;s website:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-background has-light-green-cyan-background-color\"><em>&#8220;In order to increase multitasking, decrease entropy, and improve\n integration of body and brain, her sessions have been focused on \nmindful breathing, body awareness, matching a simple to a more complex \nbeat, dancing and moving to a pulse.  The aim has been to stimulate the \nauditory cortex and hippocampus by engaging in listening, feeling the \nbeat, and breathing with the music.  The music and rhythm used in \nsessions have been used to stimulate the sensory cortex, and the primary\n motor cortex, one of the principal brain areas involved in motor \nfunction and dancing.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Clara had been a serious pianist beginning at age 5. She also taught \nherself to dance.  Her past experience in expressive arts help to form \nand reinforce alternate neural connections to increase wellness.  She \nuses expressive arts in sessions as a medium for exercising concurrent \ntasks or thoughts, and integrating body and mind.&#8221;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The improvement in Clara&#8217;s cognitive functioning now progressed \nrapidly. I saw it on daily basis. Her ability to interact with people, \nto control her emotions, and to concentrate all rose significantly.  In \nMarch, 2014, Clara attended the Symposium, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.urmc.rochester.edu\/integrative-brain-research\/symposia\/2014.aspx\">&#8220;Neurobiology and Neurology of Highly Skilled Motor Performance in Musicians,&#8221;<\/a>\n where her story was presented, and she engaged in discussions with \nleading neuroscientists from around the country.  She also attended the \n2014 conference of the American Music Therapy Association, where Maria \ngave a workshop regarding Clara&#8217;s treatment, <em>The Rewiring of a Beautiful Mind: Music Therapy, The Brain &amp; LivingDance ~ LivingMusic.<\/em>.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The hopeless feeling we all shared that she&#8217;d suffered an irreparable\n brain injury from which there would be no recovery was being replaced \nby an overriding feeling of optimism and our joy at seeing a new Clara \nbeing reborn before our very eyes, not through drugs, or surgery, but \nthrough the hard work of a dedicated team of music and dance \nprofessionals and one very strong woman.  In December 2014, she appeared\n on stage to in a dance routine with Christopher Morrison at Hochstein&#8217;s\n Winter Dance Gala, an accomplishment she would repeat in 2015.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>And now, the impossible has been achieved: she played piano again,  on stage before a live audience.  Yes, the piece was not a long one, but  it wasn&#8217;t easy for her.  Clara still cannot read  musical notes fast enough to play an extended piece of music. She  learned Kulau&#8217;s Sonatina one part at a time. She didn&#8217;t read the notes  on those three pieces of sheet music Wednesday evening.  Instead, she  used them in the manner of a cheat sheet.  While playing, she glanced at  certain highlighted portions to trigger her memory of the next part,  and then the next until she reached the end.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The method was similar to how she approached the speech she gave at  the Hochstein fundraiser in April 2016. She wrote her speech out  the day before, but she was still not capable of reading it word for  word.  Instead, Clara printed a copy and highlighted in yellow certain  phrases to help her recall the main points she needed to hit. And she  pulled it off, even adding new material that was not in the prepared  text. Hearing her talk that night, I fairly certain I was the only one  present who really understood the degree of difficulty involved as she  related her story to a jaded group of well-to-do prospective donors.  When she finished, they all to their feet to give her a standing  ovation, one that caught her off guard, but which now she can remember  with pride. We later learned from the person responsible for the event  that Hochstein raised more money that year than from any previous  fundraising &#8220;gala.&#8221;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Which brings me in a roundabout way to the reason I am writing about \nClara, other than my love for her and pride in all she had accomplished.\n  You see, the drugs she takes, the ones that are helpful in that they \nspeed up her brain transmission rate for brief periods of the day, did \nnot bring Clara to where she stands now, a woman who has regained her \nconfidence, her self worth, some might even say her soul. The cost of \nthose overpriced drugs, however, are covered in part by our medical \ninsurance. The rehabilitative program she receives from Hochstein is \nnot. To pay for the services that have made a real difference in the \nquality of her life, she must rely in part on the Hochstein School&#8217;s own\n <a href=\"http:\/\/hochstein.org\/About\/Tuition-Assistance\">tuition assistance program<\/a>.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>In America, large pharmaceutical firms broadcast daily advertisements  on television and radio, not to mention their online ads as well.   These ads portray the drugs in glowing terms, but the truth is that they  rarely deliver on the hype. And the potential side effects of ingesting  so many medications are not insignificant. The list of side effects,  which are required to be read on-air, are always recited while images of good-looking people  smiling, playing with their children, dancing at weddings or otherwise participating in  joyous activities, fill the  screen.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I&#8217;m not saying the drug companies don&#8217;t provide products that often \ncan make the difference between life and death for large numbers of \npeople.  However, many of their new drugs are no better than older ones.\n In addition they now focus on drugs that target &#8220;medical&#8221; conditions \nthat in the past no one imagined would be &#8220;cured&#8221; by a pill (e.g., \nViagra). These new types of drugs now provide a source of massive \nprofits for their manufacturers.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Even in situations where a serious medical issue is involved, often \nthere are other non-invasive treatments that can provide just as much of\n a benefit to patients, or which may help reduce the need for medicines.\n  In Clara&#8217;s case, the rehabilitation program provided by her music \ntherapist, dance instructor and piano teacher have been far more \neffective than any drug she takes. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Clara&#8217;s biggest goal in life right now is to use her own story as an \nexample for other people like herself who suffer from significant \ncognitive problems, whether veterans who return from our overseas wars \nwith Traumatic Brain Injuries (TBI) to people who suffer from \ndebilitating diseases that affect the brain, to those who have long term\n neurotoxic damage resulting from chemotherapy. She is working with a \ngraduate student on a book about her own rehabilitative journey.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>If you are disabled or have a mental illness, it&#8217;s easy to fall into \ndespair and hopelessness because our society, with it&#8217;s ethos of \nindividual achievement and it&#8217;s constant focus on &#8220;winners&#8221; and \n&#8220;losers,&#8221; rejects so many of us.  Consciously or unconsciously, many \npeople in this country still  look down upon the disabled and those who \nsuffer from mental illness as weak, and not worthy of their \nconsideration or sympathy. Worse, is the outright indifference to the \nplight we face.  Our suffering is not a societal priority, just as the \nsuffering of other marginalized communities is not a priority.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>But I don&#8217;t want to end my wife&#8217;s story on a note of anger or \nfrustration with our flawed society.  I want you to take away from it \nthe realization that good things, beneficial things, even miracles are \nstill present in our world.  So, for that reason I&#8217;m going to give Clara\n the last word on what her story is really about and the meaning you \nshould derive from it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-background has-light-green-cyan-background-color\"><em>\u201cIt is not the end that is most important\u2014rehabilitation is the \njourney.  I remain alive for a reason\u2014to be useful in my existence.  I \ncan grow as an individual\u2014I can be useful in this life.  I have hope.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Clara sat in an aisle seat at the performance hall of the Hochstein School of Music and Dance, smiling at us, holding her sheet music, because she would lead off&hellip;<\/p>\n<div class=\"read-more\"><a href=\"https:\/\/stevesearls.com\/?p=184\" class=\"read-more-link\">See More<\/a><\/div>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-184","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-my-journey"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stevesearls.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/184","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stevesearls.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stevesearls.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stevesearls.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stevesearls.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=184"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/stevesearls.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/184\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":193,"href":"https:\/\/stevesearls.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/184\/revisions\/193"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stevesearls.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=184"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stevesearls.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=184"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stevesearls.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=184"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}